Whatever the fuck happened to Crystal Pistol?
Their self-titled album is one of the best debuts I’ve ever come across and I remember thinking they were the best thing since sliced bread when 16 y.o. me first heard it in ’06. My opinion hasn’t changed much 13 years down the line.
Founded in Vancouver in 2000, Crystal Pistol is/was one of those sleaze bands that was actually good. Sure they had the guy-liner and dyed black hair like many glam punk bands in the 2000’s, but this band went beyond the looks and image. CP had a rare sense of honesty in their music.
Mik Ireland’s raw and snotty singing and primal screams are the perfect fit with the fast and blasting guitar riffs and solos being thrown at you like a blitzkrieg of squealing notes while the bass and drums drive you forward like a locomotive.
From opening track “Watch You Bleed” until the final notes of “No Fun City”, Crystal Pistol takes you on a drug fueled joyride that appropriately ends with Mik Ireland screaming he wants to burn the city down. In between there are the delightfully arrogant proclamations of being a rockstar in, well, “Rockstar”. Of course there’s a song about everybody’s favorite Colombian brand of powdered sugar, if you don’t know what kind I’m talking about they spell it out in the intro of “Line It Up”.
The only point the band slows down is on “Salt of the Earth”. Once again Crystal Pistol differentiated themselves from their peers here. Though the song is something of a ballad, it’s not the clichéd obligatory copy-paste attempt at Poison’s “Every Rose Has It’s Thorn” for extra radio play. They kept their integrity here and recorded something that doesn’t feel forced.
“XXIII” is my favorite Crystal Pistol track. The perfect anthem for someone like me, growing up in the economic crisis of the last decade, working shit jobs for shit pay, “XXIII” was and still is often necessary kick in the ass for me. “You sit around and you always complain / That life is boring and it’s always the same” always hit home & inspired me to get off my ass and stop waiting around for someone to solve my shit for me.
Songs like “Locomotive”, “Shake”, “All The Freaks” and “Live Fast” are Crystal Pistol at their best. Straight up balls-to-the-walls rockers about sex, drugs and rock n’ roll”
In 2007 the band released a 3 track E.P. called “Serpentine River”, another collection of loud n’ fast glam punk and a taste of more to come.
Then things get a bit quiet, I’ve been searching around on the web for a while now and can’t figure out whether they broke up or not. They do seem to do some shows every once in a while though. I’m still holding out hope for more releases, I stumbled upon Mik Ireland’s Soundcloud the other day and it features 3 awesome Crystal Pistol demos and I would love to hear them finished along with more new songs on a long awaited follow up to their classic debut album.
When, by some miracle, Crystal Pistol comes through your town make sure you cancel any plans you might have the next day because one thing’s for sure, the party ain’t over until they say so.
Crystal Pistol is: Mik Ireland - Vocals, Brian Bresset - Guitar, Pinto - Guitar, Dave Troutman - Drums, Greg Laikin - Bass
Buy their record here.
Listen on Spotify:
